Saturday, January 30, 2016

Guruji Speaks - Ignorance

[Q] Meena asks - Guruji, isn’t it wrong for religious shrines to impose entry restrictions on women ?

[A] Guruji - No dear, not at all. Religious doctrines are imposed for a reason and you must respect that. If the gods decide that women are not welcome inside the sanctums, they should not forcibly go there and invite the wrath of the gods. 

[Q] Meena asks - ..but Guruji, these are not restrictions imposed by gods, instead by religious leaders and the clergy..

[A] Guruji - Dear Meena, they are THE only gods, at least in such places, you have Guruji’s assurance.

[Q] Sevak asks - Guruji, we humans I understand were originally herbivores. Shouldn’t it be better for us to go back to that then ?

[A] Guruji - Son, we were originally cave dwellers and fibling-suckers too you must know. In the process of evolution, mother nature had stopped breastfeeding us early(she had to deliver one of us every 10 months you see) and trained us to hunt and eat every now and then so that our survival is ensured. So continue that way is Guruji’s advice to you all, unless of course you want to go back to the caves and start..well, you got what he is saying, don’t you.

[Q] Lata asks - Guruji, they say “scientia potentia est” or Knowledge Is Power. In that case we should be having knowledgeable people leading the society always. Isn’t this proverb wrong then?

[A] Guruji - Dear Lata, This is absolutely wrong, knowledge will not lead you anywhere. Guruji’s centuries long study shows the opposite, that - “Ignorance Is Power”.

[Q] Lata asks - Your Holiness, how could this be possible, can you please elaborate that ?

[A] Guruji - Dear, one must know that,
  • Ignorance of voters get politicians elected
  • Ignorance of consumers make businesses flourish
  • Ignorance of citizens make bureaucracy rule 
  • Ignorance of devotees make religions grow
  • Ignorance of farmers make merchants prosper
  • Ignorance of followers make political parties win elections
  • Ignorance of viewers make news channels popular
  • Ignorance of fans make Bollywood stars

[Q] Miss X asks - Guruji, what is your opinion about government rewarding citizens annually with civilian awards?

[A] Guruji - Dear Miss X, it is absolutely wrong for a government to treat it's citizens differently and reward some while ignoring others. A government should be like a mother to all it’s citizens and a mother feeding her kids according to their intellectual abilities is incorrect.

[Q] Max asks - Guruji, in that case isn’t it wrong for some of you spiritual gurus to accept these awards ?

[A] Guruji - Of course not my son, we spiritual gurus don't consider the government our mother but a mere bed partner.

[Q] Max asks - Guruji, your answers lately make me feel that you are an absolute moron with no cognisance, common sense or respect for traditions and values. Am I right?

[A] Guruji - Son Max, followers get the spiritual leader they deserve

Ok children, time for Guruji to take leave and take a leak, he will meet you same place, same time next month; unless an ATC error takes him to the heavens by then.


  1. Guruji ROCKS! What a strong argument you've put forth supporting ignorance. I am never touching a book again!

  2. Dhanyavad for Maa Purba Ka Aashirwad